Top X

People who have personal web sites often think they are frightfully interesting. Because I have a personal web site I must therefore be one of those people. Correspondingly, I think it is only logical to inflict upon you a variety of my personal top-x type of things.

TOP 10 ALBUMS OF 1986

Metallica – “Master of Puppets”
Queensrÿche – “Rage for Order”
Malmsteen, Yngwie J. – “Trilogy”
Slayer – “Reign in Blood”
Sodom – “In the Sign of Evil” (debut album)
Kreator – “Pleasure to Kill”
Venom – “Possessed”
Racer X – “Street Lethal” (debut album)
Satriani, Joe – “Not of this Earth” (debut album)
Roth, David Lee – “Eat ‘Em And Smile”

TOP 10 ALBUMS OF 1987

Cacophony – “Speed Metal Symphony” (their first)
Rush – “Hold your Fire”
Sodom – “Persecution Mania”
King Diamond – “Abigail”
David Chastain – “Instrumental Variations” (his first)
Savatage – “Hall of the Mountain King”
Helloween – “Walls of Jericho” (their first)
Anthrax – “Among the Living”
Napalm Death – “Scum” (their ear-numbing debut)
Saga – “In Transit”

TOP 10 ALBUMS OF 1988

Metallica – “…And Justice for All”
Queensrÿche – “Operation Mindcrime”
Jason Becker – “Perpetual Burn”
Sodom – “Mortal Way of Live”
Jarre – “Revolutions”
Malmsteen – “Odyssey”
Vangelis – “Direct”
Flotsam & Jetsam – “No Place for Disgrace”
Vendetta – “Brain Damage”
Iron Maiden – “Seventh Son of a Seventh Son”

TOP 10 ALBUMS OF 1989

Malmsteen – “Trial by Fire”
Rush – “Show of Hands”
Faith no More – “The Real Thing”
Satriani – “Flying in a Blue Dream”
Sepultura – “Beneath the Remains”
Sodom – “Agent Orange”
Obituary – “Slowly we Rot”
Mucky Pup – “A Boy in a Man’s World”
Annihilator – “Alice in Hell”
Jean Michel Jarre – “Live”

TOP 10 ALBUMS OF 1990

Megadeth – “Rust in Piece” (with Marty Friedman now)
Obituary – “Cause of Death”
Entombed – “Left Hand Path”
Steve Vai – “Passion and Warfare”
Yngwie Malmsteen – “Eclipse”
Queensrÿche – “Empire”
Napalm Death – “Harmony Corruption”
Gwar – “Scumdogs of the Universe”
Led Zeppelin – “Remasters”
Fields of the Nephilim – “Earth Inferno”

TOP 10 ALBUMS OF 1991

Metallica – “Metallica”
Fear of God – “Within the Veil”
Slayer – “Decade of Aggression”
Sepultura – “Arise” (their best)
Paradise Lost – “Gothic”
Fates Warning – “Parallels”
Mads Eriksen – “Storyteller”
My Dying Bride – “Symphonaire…” (debut EP)
Entombed – “Clandestine”
Pearl Jam – “Ten” (the only grunge band really worth its salt)

TOP 10 ALBUMS OF 1992

Dream Theater – “Images and Words”
Paradise Lost – “Shades of God”
Megadeth – “Countdown to Extinction”
Joe Satriani – “The Extremist”
Pan-Thy-Monium – “Dawn of Dreams”
My Dying Bride – “As the Flower Withers”
Whistler Courbois Whistler – self-titled debut
The Gathering – “Always…”
Pantera – “Vulgar Display of Power”
Rage Against the Machine – self-titled debut

TOP 10 ALBUMS OF 1993

Anathema – “Serenades”
My Dying Bride – “Turn Loose the Swans”
Mercyful Fate – “In the Shadows”
Paradise Lost – “Icon”
Metallica – “Live Shit Binge & Purge” box
Bjørk – “Debut”
Rush – “Counterparts”
Van Halen – “Live, Right Here, Right Now”
Gorefest – “The Eindhoven Insanity”
Meat Loaf – “Bat out of Hell II”

TOP 10 ALBUMS OF 1994

Septic Flesh – “Mystic Places of Dawn”
Dream Theater – “Awake”
Queensrÿche – “Promised Land”
At The Gates – “Terminal Spirit Disease”
Nightfall – “Macabre Sunsets”
Mercyful Fate – “Time”
Orphaned Land – “Sahara”
Napalm Death – “Fear Emptiness Despair”
Obituary – “World Demise”
Altar – “Youth Against Christ”

TOP 10 ALBUMS OF 1995

My Dying Bride – “The Angel and the Dark River”
Orphanage – “Oblivion”
Septic Flesh – “Esoptron”
Dream Theater – “A Change of Seasons” (EP)
Yngwie Malmsteen – “Magnum Opus”
Tristitia – “One with Darkness”
Celestial Season – “Solar Lovers”
The Gathering – “Mandylion”
Nightfall – “Athenian Echoes”
Paradise Lost – “Draconian Times”

TOP 10 ALBUMS OF 1996

Jason Becker – “Perspective”
Cradle of Filth – “Dusk…and her Embrace”
Therion – “Theli”
Dark Tranquillity – “The Gallery”
Samael – “Passage”
Sadist – “Tribe”
Elend – “Les Ténèbres du Dehors”
Metallica – “Load”
Deep Purple – “Purpendicular”
Apocalyptica – “Plays Metallica by Four Cellos”

TOP 25 ALBUMS OF THE 19XX MILLENNIUM

1 Jason Becker – “Perspective”
2 Metallica – “…And Justice for All”
3 Queensryche – “Operation: Mindcrime”
4 Deep Purple – “Made in Japan”
5 Dream Theater – “Metropolis Pt. 2 – Scenes from a Memory”
6 Iron Maiden – “Live after Death”
7 Kiss – “Alive II”
8 Jimi Hendrix – “Electric Ladyland”
9 Yngwie Malmsteen – “Rising Force”
10 Steve Vai – “Passion and Warfare”
11 Rainbow – “Live in Germany”
12 Judas Priest – “’98 Live Meltdown”
13 Metal Church – “Metal Church”
14 Rush – “Exit…Stage Left”
15 Cradle of Filth – “Dusk…and her Embrace”
16 Black Sabbath – “Heaven and Hell”
17 Slayer – “Decade of Aggression”
18 Emperor – “Anthems to the Welkin at Dusk”
19 Death – “The Sound of Perseverance”
20 Mercyful Fate – “Melissa”
21 Megadeth – “Rust in Piece”
22 Obituary – “Cause of Death”
23 Venom – “Black Metal”
24 Entombed – “Left Hand Path”
25 Van Halen – “Van Halen”

TOP 10 ALBUMS OF 2004

Disillusion – Back To Times Of Splendour
Sacred Steel – Iron Blessings
Various Artists – G3 Live: Rockin’ In The Free World
My Dying Bride – Songs Of Darkness, Words Of Light
Orphaned Land – Mabool: The Story Of The Three Sons Of Seven
Paul Gilbert – Acoustic Samurai
Exodus – Tempo Of The Damned
Finntroll – Nattfödd
Within Temptation – The Silent Force
Probot – Probot

TOP 10 ALBUMS OF 2005

Opeth – Ghost Reveries
Nile – Annihilation of the Wicked
Obituary – Frozen in Time
Steve Vai – Real Illusions: Reflections
Equilibrium – Turis Fratyr
Bolt Thrower – Those once Loyal
Pure Sweet Hell – The Voyeurs of Utter Destruction
Old Man’s Child – Vermin
John Petrucci – Suspended Animation
Ordo Draconis – Camera Obscura Pt. 1: The Star Chamber Reviews

TOP 10 ALBUMS OF 2006

Disillusion – Gloria
Delain – Lucidity
Katatonia – The Great Cold Distance
In Extremo – Raue Spree
Rainbow – Deutschland Tournee (Box)
Trivium – The Crusade
Deicide – The Stench Of Rememption
My Dying Bride – A Line Of Deathless Kings
Paul Gilbert – Get Out Of My Yard
Aghora – Formless

TOP 10 ALBUMS OF 2007

Candlemass – King Of The Grey Islands
Dimmu Borgir – In Sorte Diaboli
Monstrosity – Spiritual Apocalypse
Vital Remains – Icons Of Evil
Nile – Ithyphallic
Symphony X – Paradise Lost
Devildriver – The Last Kind Words
Rush – Snakes And Arrows
Finntroll – Ur Jordens Djup
Within Temptation – The Heart Of Everything

TOP ALBUMS OF 2008

Candlemass – Lucifer Rising
Gojira – The Way Of All Flesh
In Extermo – Saengerkrieg
Metallica – Death Magnetic (the Bryston mix, not the original!)
My Dying Bride – An Ode To Woe
The Cavalera Conspiracy – Inflikted

TOP ALBUMS OF 2009

Candlemass – Death Magic Doom
Chickenfoot – Chickenfoot
Destruction – The Curse of the Antichrist – Live in Agony
Dream Theater – Black Clouds and Silver Linings
Heaven & Hell – The Devil you Know
In Extremo – Am Goldenen Rhein
Kreator – Hordes of Chaos
Nile – Those Whom the Gods Detest
Slayer – World Painted Blood
Tardy Brothers – Bloodline
Vader – Necropolis

TOP ALBUMS OF 2010

Cradle of Filth – Darkly, Darkly Venus Aversa
Dimmu Borgir – Abrahadabra
Grave – Burial Ground
Iron Maiden – The Final Frontier
Opeth – Live in Concert at the Royal Albert Hall
Therion – Sitra Ahra
Troll – Neo-Satanic Supremacy

TOP ALBUMS OF 2011

In Extremo – Sterneisen
Dream Theater – A Dramatic Turn of Events
Fleshgod Apocalypse – Agony
Mastodon – The Hunter
MaYaN – Quarterpast
Opeth – Heritage
Septic Flesh – The Great Mass
Symphony X – Iconoclast
Vader – Welcome to the Morbid Reich
Within Temptation – The Unforgiving

TOP ALBUMS OF 2012

Kreator – “Phantom Antichrist”
Rainbow – “On Stage” (deluxe edition)
Rush – “Clockwork Angels”
Saxon – “Heavy Metal Thunder – Live”
Van Halen – “A Different Kind of Truth”

TOP ALBUMS OF 2013

Dream Theater – “Dream Theater”
ReVamp – “Wild Card”
Queensrÿche – “Queensrÿche”
Carcass – “Surgical Steel”
Avatarium – “Avatarium”
Finntroll – “Blodsvept”
Deep Purple – “Now What?!”

TOP ALBUMS OF 2014

Obituary – “Inked in Blood”
Bloodbath – “Grand Morbid Funeral”
Vader – “Tibi et Igni”

TOP ALBUMS OF 2015

Gruesome – “Savage Land”
Slayer – “Repentless”
Six Feet Under – “Crypt of the Devil”
Grave – “Out of Respect for the Dead”

TOP ALBUMS OF 2016

Metallica – “Hardwired to Self-Destruct”
Sodom – “Decision Day”
Vader – “The Empire”

TOP ALBUMS OF 2017

Sons of Apollo – “Psychotic Symphony”
Obituary – “Obituary”
Destruction – “Thrash Anthems II”
Cradle of Filth – “Cryptoriana – The Seductiveness of Decay”

TOP ALBUMS OF 2018

Dimmu Borgir – “Eonian”
Bloodbath – “The Arrow of Satan is Drawn”
Jason Becker – “Triumphant Hearts”
Phlebotomized – “Deformation of Humanity”
Joe Satriani – “What Happens Next”
Saxon – “Thunderbolt”

TOP ALBUMS OF 2019

Disillusion – “The Liberation”
Entombed – “Clandestine Live”
King Diamond – “Songs for the Dead”
Sons of Apollo – “MMXX”

TOP ALBUMS OF 2020

Deep Purple – “Whoosh!”
Fates Warning – “Long Day Good Night”
John Petrucci – “Terminal Velocity”
Six Feet Under – “Nightmare of the Decomposed”
Sodom – “Genesis XIX”
Vader – “Solitude in Madness”

TOP BANDS

Dream Theater
Old Metallica
Kiss
Iron Maiden
Dimmu Borgir
Cradle of Filth
Deep Purple
Old Yngwie Malmsteen
Mercyful Fate
Monstrosity
Therion
My Dying bride
Venom
Slayer
Steve Vai
Obituary
Rush
Vital Remains
Judas Priest
Saxon
Nile
Symphony X
Candlemass
ReVamp

TOP CDS

Deep Purple – “Made in Japan”
Metallica – “…And Justice for All”
Dimmu Borgir – “Puritanical Euphoric Misanthropia”
Dream Theater – “Scenes from a Memory”
Yngwie Malmsteen – “Rising Force”
Jason Becker – “Perspective”
Monstrosity – “In Dark Purity”
Covenant – “Nexus Polaris”
Emperor – “Anthems to the Welkin at Dusk”
Borknagar – “The Olden Domain”
In Extremo – “Sünder Ohne Zügel”
Fear of God – “Within the Veil”
Kiss – “Alive II”
Immortal – “Damned in Black”
Cradle of Filth “Dusk…And Her Embrace”
Obituary – “Cause of Death”
Rainbow – “Live in Germany 1976”
Queensryche – “Operation Mindcrime”
Jimi Hendrix – “Electric Ladyland”
Arcturus – “Aspera Hiems Sympfonia”
Abattoir – “Vicious Attack”
Disillusion – “Back to Times of Splendour”
Cradle of Filth – “Midian”
Vader – “Litany”
Nile – “Annihilation of the Wicked”

TOP UNUSUAL/UNIQUE/DIFFERENT/AVANT GARDE/INTERESTING BANDS

Nile
Otyg
In Extremo
Pan-Thy-Monium
Opeth
Elend
Sikth

TOP “WHY-DID-THEY-ADD-THAT-SHITTY-TRACK-ON-AN-OTHERWISE-EXCELLENT-CD” SONGS

“Speed of Love” (Rush “Counterparts”)
“The Silent Man” (Dream Theater “Awake”)
“Magnetic Fields Part V” (Jean Michel Jarre “Magnetic Fields”)
“Dreaming (The Romance)” (Anathema “Serenades”)
“Waiting for Cousteau” (Jean Michel Jarre “Waiting for Cousteau”)
“Glorianna” (Vangelis “Direct”)
“Behrial” (Pan-Thy-Monium “III-Khaooohs And Kon-Fus-Ion”)
…and every bit of pointless noise after x seconds/minutes of silence at the end of a CD (like, for example, on Nirvana’s “Nevermind” and (unfortunately) countless others)

TOP FILMS (OR ‘MOVIES’ FOR ALL YOU AMERICANS)

“The Lord of the Rings” trilogy
“The Hobbit” Trilogy
“The Blues Brothers”
“Hugo”
“Gladiator”
“Titanic”
“Blade Runner”
“Blade Runner 2049”
“Jurassic Park”
“Groundhog Day”
“Shrek”
“Independence Day”
“Twister”
“Braveheart”
“Terminator 2”
“Minority Report”
“Amélie”
“Once Upon a Time in America”
“Once Upon a Time in the West”
“The Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind”
“A Very Long Engagement”
“The Island”
“2012” (yes, I guess many would say I have no taste)
“Sherlock Holmes”
“Avatar”
“Austin Powers Goldmember”
“Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them”
“Deadpool”

TOP SCARIEST FILMS (…)

“Gothika”
“The Conjuring”
“Darkness Falls”
“The Ring”
“Alien” (well, OK, I was much younger at the time)
“Sinister”
“Lights Out”
“The Urge” (2019)

TOP WORST FILMS (…)

“Cats”
“Green Lantern”
“Movie 43”
“Zombie Flesh Eaters”
“Tank Girl”
“Splatter: Architects of Fear”
“Master of Disguise”
“Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back” (ouch!)
“Darkwolf”
“Honey”
“Sammy’s Adventure”
“Prisoners of the Ghostland”
“Lara Croft Tombraider: Cradle of Life” was pretty stupid, too

TOP ENGLISH BOOKS

Stephen King – “The Stand”
Stephen King – “Needful Things”
Douglas Adams – the Dirk Gently books
J.R.R. Tolkien- “The Lord of the Rings”
George Orwell – “1984”
Tad Williams – “Otherland” series
Stephen Donaldson – “Thomas Covenant the Unbeliever” series
John Irving – “A Prayer for Owen Meany”
John Irving – “Son of the Circus”
Hickman & Weis – “Dragonlance Chronicles” series
Guy Favriel Kay – “Fionavar Tapestry” series
Stephen Donaldson – “The Gap” series
Douglas Adams – “The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy” series (primarily the first three instalments, and definitely not the sixth part)
Terry Pratchett – “Discworld” series, especially the ones starting from “Mort”
Sebastian Faulks – “Birdsong”
Robert Jordan – “Wheel of Time” series (first 5 or 6 volumes)

TOP DUTCH BOOKS

Thomas Olde Heuvelt – “Hex”
Willem Brakman – “De Gifmenger”
Thomas Olde Heuvelt – “Orakel”

TOP CONCERTS (CHRONOLOGICAL)

Metallica & Queensryche co-headlining – Groenoordhallen, Leiden, Netherlands, 5 November 1988
Joe Satriani “Flying in a Blue Tour” – Vredenburg, Utrecht, Netherlands 10 June 1990
Queensryche “Building Empires” tour – Music Hall, Hannover, Germany, 22 November 1990
Paradise Lost – Tivoli, Utrecht, Netherlands, 11 March 1994
Yngwie Malmsteen – Nighttown, Rotterdam, Netherlands, 12 May 1994
Dream Theater – Vredenburg, Utrecht, Netherlands, 15 February 1995
Venom – Waldrock, Burgum, Netherlands, 24 June 1995
Dynamo Open Air (with Venom and Slayer) – Eindhoven, Netherlands, May 1996
Orphanage – Tivoli, Utrecht, Netherlands, 26 October 1996
Mercyful Fate & King Diamond – Melkweg Max, Amsterdam, Netherlands, 22 March 1997
Kiss – Prins van Oranjehal, Utrecht, Netherlands, 11 June 1997
Steve Vai “Ultra Zone” tour – De Vereeniging, Nijmegen, Netherlands 7 March 2000
Within Temptation – Tivoli, Utrecht, Netherlands, 25 January 2001
Dream Theater – Ahoy, Rotterdam, Netherlands, 3 November 2002
In Extremo – Willem 2, Den Bosch, Netherlands, 15 December 2002
The Big 4 – Veltins Arena, Gelsenkirchen, Germany, 2 July 2011
Feuerengel – Hedon, Zwolle, Netherlands, 13 April 2019

TOP CONCERTS I DIDN’T/COULDN’T VISIT BUT WOULD REALLY HAVE LIKED TO

Woodstock (1969)
Deep Purple – Japanese Tour (August 1972)
Rainbow – German Tour (1976)
Kiss – Groenoordhallen, Leiden (5 October 1980)
Aardschokdag (with Metallica and Venom) (11 February 1984)
Venom – Hammersmith Odeon, London (1 June 1984)
Dream Theater – European “Scenes from a Memory” Tour (2000)
Metallica – all their December 2011 anniversary shows at the Fillmore

TOP ACTORS

Jack Nicholson
Robert DeNiro
Jim Carrey
Kevin Spacey
Bruce Willis
Anthony Hopkins
Bill Murray
Clint Eastwood
Sylvester Stallone
Arnold Schwarzenegger
Ryan Reynolds

TOP (OR PERHAPS ACTUALLY ‘HOTTEST’) ACTRESSES

Imogen Stubbs (“Erik the Viking”)
Faye Grant (“V” – the original series)
Claudia Cardinale (in “Once Upon a Time in the West”)
Lesley-Anne Down (in “North & South” – if there was ever an actress I just about fell in love with during my puberty it was her)
Wendy Frazier (the girl that got the make-over in ZZ Top’s “Legs” video clip)
Melinda Culea (“The A-Team”)
Christina Applegate (I can’t help it – “Married With Children” was televised here while I was of an impressionable age)
Ana de Armas (“Bladerunner 2049”)
Margot Robbie (“The Wolf of Wall Street”, “Suicide Squad”)

TOP DUTCH BABES WHO AREN’T MY WIFE

Katja Schuurman
Chantal Janzen
Jolanthe Cabau van Kasbergen (though these days she had become quite artificial and too skinny)

TOP DIRECTORS

Stephen Spielberg
James Cameron
Renny Harlin
Terry Gilliam
Ridley Scott
Jean-Pierre Jeunet
Guy Ritchie

TOP MALE VOCALISTS

Russell Allen (Symphony X)
Ray Alder (Fates Warning)
James Hetfield (Metallica)
Ronnie James Dio (Dio, ex-Rainbow, ex-Black Sabbath – upto his final shows)
Ian Gillan (Deep Purple – up to the mid 70s)
King Diamond (KD & Mercyful Fate)
David Lee Roth
Geoff Tate (Queensryche – but he lost his touch in the early 90s)
Glen Benton (Deicide) (best death metal vocalist by far)

TOP WORST MALE VOCALISTS

Axl Rose (Guns’n’Roses)
Graham Bonnett (ex-Rainbow, ex-Alcatrazz)
Ozzy Osbourne (Black Sabbath, Ozzy solo)
Dave Mustaine (Megadeth)
Devin Townsend (ex-Vai, Strapping Young Lad, solo)
Jeff Martin (Racer X)

TOP FEMALE VOCALISTS

Floor Jansen (After Forever)
Sharon den Adel (Within Temptation)
Mariana Holmberg (Left Hand Solution)
Vibeke Stene (Tristania)
Anneke van Giersbergen (ex-The Gathering, Agua de Annique)
Dawn Crosby (Fear of God – though more raw emotion than singing technique)
Leanan Sidhe (Beholder)
Simone Simons (Epica)

TOP WORST FEMALE VOCALISTS

Ipek (Wykked Wytch)
The Great Kat
Courtney Love (Hole)
Ashlee Simpson is pretty effing horrible too

TOP GUITAR PLAYERS

Jason Becker
John Petrucci (Dream Theater)
Steve Vai
Joe Satriani
Yngwie Malmsteen
Michael Romeo (Symphony X)
Jimi Hendrix
Ritchie Blackmore (Deep Purple, Rainbow)
Ron “Bumblefoot” Thal
Bernd Steidl
Paul Gilbert
Daniele Gottardo
Guthrie Govan

TOP GUITAR SOLOS

“The Shed (Subtle)” – Rainbow (Ritchie Blackmore)
“Back Seat Driver” – Steeler (Yngwie Malmsteen)
“Stargazer” – Rainbow (Ritchie Blackmore)
“Gates of Babylon” – Rainbow (Ritchie Blackmore)
“Moonlight Shadow” – Mike Oldfield
“The Villa” – Dr. Mastermind (Kurt James)
“November Rain” – Guns’n’Roses (Slash) (final solos)

TOP OVERRATED GUITAR PLAYERS

Eric Clapton
Carlos Santana
Kirk Hammett (Metallica)
Dimebag Darrell (ex-Pantera)
Jimmy Page (ex-Led Zeppelin)

TOP BASSISTS

Stuart Hamm
Steve Harris (Iron Maiden)
Billy Sheehan
Cronos (Venom)

TOP DRUMMERS

Neil Peart (Rush)
Mike Portnoy (ex-Dream Theater)
Flo Mounier (Cryptopsy)
Richard Christy (Death, Control Denied)
Stewart Copeland (Police)
Marco Minnemann (The Aristocrats)
Doc (Vader)
Dave Suzuki (ex-Vital Remains, Churchburn)
Gene Hoglan (ex-old Man’s Child, ex-Death, Strapping Young Lad)
Brann Dailor (Mastodon)
Jan Axel von Blomberg (a.k.a. Hellhammer – Covenant, Arcturus, Dimmu Borgir)
George Kollias (Nile, ex-Nightfall)
Mike Mangini (Dream Theater)
Nicholas (Nick) Barker (ex-Cradle of Filth, ex-Dimmu Borgir, ex-Old Man’s Child)

TOP KEYBOARD PLAYERS

Jens Johansson (ex-Malmsteen)
Jordan Rudess (Dream Theater)

TOP TV SERIES

“Duckman”
“Red Dwarf”
“Walking with Dinosaurs”
“Walking with Beasts”
“The Simpsons”
“V” (and the 21st century re-imagining as well)
“Band of Brothers”
“The Sopranos”
“Friends” (my feminine side, I guess)
“My Name is Earl”
“Game of Thrones”
“Modern Family”
“Married with Children”
“Sherlock Holmes” (with Benedict Cumberbatch)
“Santa Clarita Diet”
“Modern Family”
“Westworld”
“Community”
“Dark” (well, mostly the first 2 seasons)
“Lupin”
“Paradise PD” (though it’s really quite crass)
“His Dark Materials”

TOP DISLIKES (SOMETIMES REALLY STRONG ONES)

Gnats
Spam
Blacklight
Modern R&B
Computer Viruses, Trojans, Malware, etc.
Smoking
Organised Religion
Tau whores in “Halflife Death Match”
RPG whores in “Halflife 2 Death Match”
Bling Bling
Juice Channels
MTV culture
$haron O$bourne
Talentless media whores (e.g. Paris Hilton, the Kardashians…)
Republicans
Creationists
Brexiters
The NRA
US Democracy
Donald Trump
SayAt
Auto-tune vocals
Contemporary Dutch gangsta rap
TikTok
Anti-vaxxers
Wasabi

TOP COMMODORE 64 GAMES

Wizard
Delta
Fort Apocalypse
Lode Runner (any version)
Uridium
Jumpman
Raid on Bungeling Bay
Gyruss
Summer Games
Rally Speedway
Frantic Freddie
Bandits
Commando
Who Dares Wins
Who Dares Wins II
Blue Max
Commodore Soccer
Dino Eggs

TOP ATARI ST GAMES

Blood Money
Bubble Bobble
Gods
Magic Pockets
Llamatron
Rick Dangerous
Arkanoid
Arkanoid II (The Revenge of Doh)
Super Sprint
Lemmings
Super Gridrunner
Wizball
Starball
Crystal Castles
Plutos

TOP PC GAMES

Halflife
Duke Nuke’m 3D
Gridrunner++
Halflife 2
Carmageddon
Carmageddon 2
Carmageddon Reincarnation
Dino Eggs Rebirth

TOP PC APPS

Firefox
SoulseekQT
STeem (Atari ST emulator)
Google Earth
DropBox
MP3Tag

TOP WORST PC APPS

iTunes

TOP iPad/iPHONE APPS

Shazam
Google Earth
Pocket Universe
SplashID

TOP IPAD/IPHONE GAMES

Real Racing
Real Racing 3
Plants vs Zombies
Plants vs Zombies 2
Fieldrunners
Fielsrunners 2
Fieldrunners Attack
Fruit Ninja
Cut the Rope
Asphalt 9

TOP COMMODORE 64 TUNES

Knuckle Buster (Rob Hubbard)
Master of Magic (Rob Hubbard)
Parallax (Martin Galway)
Rambo (Martin Galway)
Monty on the Run (Rob Hubbard)
Delta (Rob Hubbard)
Spellbound (Rob Hubbard)
Lightforce (Rob Hubbard)
Panther (David Whittaker)
Auf Wiedersehen Monty (Rob Hubbard & Ben Daglish)
Trap (Ben Daglish)
Thrust (Rob Hubbard)
W.A.R. (Rob Hubbard)
Comic Bakery (Martin Galway)

TOP CHARITIES

Jason Becker
World Wildlife Fund
Any Cancer Fund
Any ALS Fund

TOP THINGS I’D LIKE TO SEE HAPPEN

The design of an FPGA-based computer that can be reprogrammed via software to emulate practically any classic computer/console 100%, entirely based on memory cards
The invention of a gadget that will attract dust from your entire room, which can be easily emptied
The invention of a gadget that *really* gets rid of gnats in a way that is safe for pets and humans
An vaccine against viruses in general (not just Covid, but also Malaria and whatever else)

TOP THINGS I’D DO IF I WERE TO WIN A GAZILLION (YAY MATERIALISM!)

Stop working more than one or two days a week
Try my hand at creative writing again
Buy two “Saarloos Wolfshonden” (which actually appears to be “Saarlooswolfhond” in English)
Learn modern Greek, buy an airconditioned (!) place in Greece with a view of the sea (or maybe learn Italian instead, and buy a place on the Amalfi coast)
Donate significantly to the charities mentioned above
Get a 1959 “Brock/Sapra” sunburst Gibson Les Paul guitar
Get the 1954 sunburst Fender Stratocaster serial #0387 from Yasuhiko Iwanade’s “The Galaxy of Strats”, or one very much like it
Get a 1989 Custom Shop 35th Anniversary Stratocaster
Get a MIJ 1997 Ritchie Blackmore signature model Stratocaster with black plastic parts
Get an original 1958 korina Gibson Explorer
Get a 1978 B.C. Rich Bich Koa double neck
Get a Music Man John Petrucci signature guitar in pearl redburst, with 7 strings, tremolo, JP logo at 1st fret and piezo bridge
Get a life-size replica or even an original of a mature T. rex skull fossil
Get a Volvo XC70 2.5T in Black Sapphire Metallic
Get a Chrysler PT Cruiser 2.4i GT Turbo in Onyx Green Pearl
Make a trip around the world (and at least see Grand Canyon, Taj Mahal, Potala Palace, Great Wall of China, The Shwedagon Pagoda, Mont Saint-Michel, Machu Picchu and The Great Barrier Reef)

TOP REASONS WHY I’D LIKE TO BE PAUL GILBERT

He can play the guitar really, really well
He seems to be rather a nice guy
He is creative and has a great sense of humour
He probably has enough money to be able only to do things he likes
He has quite a few guitars
He has more hair than me 🙂

TOP REGRETS

Not personally witnessing the fall of the Berlin wall (I was at the Amiga Messe in Cologne, Germany, for my work at Thalion at the time)